Over the weekend I shared on my Instagram @therealashleyta that I was celebrating my ONE YEAR birthday of starting my podcast channel, “The Power of You“. It honestly kind of snuck on me because it really hasn’t felt like it’s been a whole year. But over the last year, I really have enjoyed being able to share more of myself on this podcast channel, as well as share real life lessons I’ve learned over the last 10+ years of my own path to self-discovery.
But as we know, the path to self-discovery, growth and success (of any kind) is NOT easy. It’s full of twists, turns, ups, downs, and even moments where you feel like you are taking steps back. And while all of those twists and turns can feel scary, uncomfortable and even defeating… that’s just a part of the journey. A part of your journey that will help you grow into whatever it is you are trying to achieve. A part of the journey that will make you stronger. A part of the journey that you will look back on down the line and feel so proud of the fact you continued to push through, even when the challenges and obstacles you were facing were meant to stop you. That pride is unlike anything else.
But what about the space in time BEFORE all of that?
The space WAY before you even make the decision to just “go for it”.
The space where you are holding yourself back because you “don’t have all the answers yet“.
Or because you “don’t know where to start“.
Or because “people won’t take me serious“.
Or maybe even because you’re fearful of failing, so you just don’t try so you can avoid failure.
TRUST ME. BEEN THERE, THOUGHT ALL OF THAT.
It’s so scary to step into unknown territory, especially when you start looking at all those around you who are already successfully doing what you want to do. But the thing you have to remember is…
Everyone starts out as a beginner. At literally EVERYTHING. Anyone you look at, and compare yourself to.. was ONCE a beginner. They started at square one, probably feeling and thinking the same things, just like you. SO everything you are feeling and experiencing before you step into something new.. is NORMAL.
And that is EXACTLY how I felt before I started my weight loss journey, before I started coaching, before I started my podcast and even how I felt before I decided to start this blog. Those feelings are completely normal. You just have to 1. give yourself the space to realize that these feelings are normal, 2. give yourself permission to feel the fear 3. do it anyway, baby.
LEARN AS YOU GO & LEARN AS YOU GROW
I know, “sooooo cliche, Ashley.”
But hear me out..
I know we tend to fear failure., but really ask yourself this:
What defines failure to YOU? What does failing look like to YOU? When you say, “I’m afraid I’m going to fail.” What does that really mean?
Because what might really need to happen, is you might need to 1. define what failure means to you, 2. view “failure” differently.
BUT IF YOU NEED TO HEAR THIS TODAY…
It is OKAY to make mistakes and to even experience setbacks in whatever it is you are doing.
In fact, it’s not just okay, it’s actually necessary for your growth and learning.
So I just want to encourage you if you are thinking of starting something new to embrace those mistakes, embrace those setbacks, and to remember that those mistakes and setbacks are not here to mess things up— but to provide you valuable opportunities to keep growing and learning 🤗
I also know we don’t always want to hear this but…
you NEED to allow yourself to make those mistakes…
Because when you’re making mistakes, and you’re having to reset and refocus and realign from time to time… that means you’re stepping out of your comfort zone, taking risks, and you’re exploring uncharted territories.
It also means you’re being vulnerable.
It means you’re showing up every single day despite not knowing how it’s going to turn out… and you’re still doing it…. and that is so powerful.
And so brave of you, because that’s NOT easy to do.
Viewing “failure” differently”
So once you have YOUR definition of “failure”, let us use that to shift your perspective, and reframe how you perceive and interpret failure.
Here are some ways to view failure in a positive light:
1. Embrace failure as a learning opportunity: Instead of viewing failure as a negative outcome, see it as an opportunity to learn and grow. Each failure can provide valuable lessons and insights that can lead to future success.
2. See failure as a stepping stone to success: Many successful individuals have experienced multiple failures before achieving their goals. Failure can be a necessary part of the journey towards success, as it allows you to refine your approach and develop resilience.
3. Focus on the lessons learned: Instead of dwelling on the disappointment of failure, shift your focus to the lessons you have gained. Reflect on what went wrong, what you can do differently next time, and how you can improve.
4. Use failure as motivation: Let failure fuel your motivation and determination to keep going. Use it as a positive force to push yourself harder and strive for better results.
5. Recognize that failure is temporary: Failure is not a permanent state. It is a momentary setback that can be overcome with persistence and a positive mindset. Keep in mind that failure does not define your worth or potential for success.
6. Celebrate small wins and progress: Even if you experience setbacks or failures along the way, acknowledge and celebrate your small wins and the progress you have made. Recognizing your efforts and achievements can help boost your confidence and keep you motivated.
7. Surround yourself with a supportive network: Seek support from friends, mentors, or a community of like-minded individuals who can provide encouragement and guidance during challenging times. Having a supportive network can help you view failure as a shared experience and gain different perspectives.
It’s not always easy to “start before you’re ready”.
Before I started my podcast channel, I went back and forth on why I shouldn’t do it for YEARS (literally years). I found that I was allowing my own self-limiting beliefs to hold me back, and was allowing this negative narrative to keep me from pursuing something I thought about often.
Tell me if you have ever thought or felt any of these things while thinking of pursuing something:
👉🏻Fear of Failure: Many people are afraid that they will fail if they start something new. This fear can prevent them from taking any action at all, as they worry about the potential consequences of failure.
👉🏻Self-Doubt: People will often doubt their own abilities and question whether they have what it takes to succeed. They may feel inadequate or compare themselves to others, which can lead to a lack of confidence and a reluctance to start.
👉🏻Perfectionism: The need for perfection can be paralyzing. Some individuals believe that they must have all the details figured out and everything in place before they can begin. This mindset can prevent them from ever getting started. Which is why I constantly remind and share with my clients, “it’s okay to start messy” 💓
👉🏻Fear of Judgment: The fear of what others will think or say can be a significant barrier to starting something new. People may worry about criticism or negative opinions from others, leading them to shy away from pursuing their goals.
👉🏻Lack of Clarity: When people lack clarity about their goals or vision, they may feel overwhelmed or unsure of where to start. The lack of a clear direction can make it difficult to take the first steps. That is why I love the idea of creating goals with action steps. This will help create that crystal clear vision to help you get started.
👉🏻Comfort Zone: Many people prefer to stay within their comfort zone, where they feel safe and familiar. Stepping outside of this zone can be uncomfortable and challenging, leading to a resistance to start something new.
👉🏻Past Experiences: Negative past experiences or past failures can create a fear of repeating the same mistakes. These experiences can linger in our minds and discourage us from ever trying again. And if you deal with this, my biggest piece of advice would be to remind yourself that each time you try again is a new experience. So don’t allow yourself to get into the negative head space of, “every attempt is the same”, because it’s not.
How do I start before I’m ready? 👀
DEFINE YOUR VISION: This step is SO important, and anytime I work with a new client, this is the FIRST thing we do. Because in order to work towards something, you HAVE to have a ✨CRYSTAL CLEAR✨ vision and game plan! 🙌🏻 So before you even get started… Take some time to clearly define what you want to achieve. WRITE IT DOWN! Yes, actually WRITE IT DOWN and hang it somewhere you can visually see it DAILY. Having that clear vision will help guide your actions and keep you motivated.
BREAK IT DOWN, BABY: Once you have your vision ✨CRYSTAL CLEAR✨ in mind (and placed where you can see it daily), don’t be afraid to break down your goals into smaller more manageable steps. This will make the process feel less overwhelming and allow you to focus on one task at a time. The way I like to explain this process to clients is using the “learning to swim” analogy. When you first learn to swim, you don’t start in the deep in, right? NO. You start in the shallow side, maybe with some type of floatation device until you feel more comfortable. Then as you start to gain confidence, you take off the floaties and go a little bit further out, and try new things. You are slowly, and gradually adding more as you feel comfortable. And it’s the same thing when it comes to starting in on ANY new goal. Give yourself the time and the grace to become more comfortable with where you’re at before you add on more.
TAKE ACTION: Don’t wait for the perfect moment or until you feel completely ready. Because, I don’t want to be the one to break it to ya (but I will 😉), but there will NEVER be a perfect moment to start anything. So.. take action now, even if it’s just a small step. Progress is progress, no matter how small. The important thing is to get started and keep moving forward.
LEARN AS YOU GO: Understand that you may not have all the knowledge or skills right from the beginning. But that’s okay, NO ONE DOES. So give yourself permission to just embrace the learning process, and be open to acquiring new knowledge and skills along the way. Remember, every successful person started as a beginner. Give yourself some grace.
FIND A MENTOR: Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. And don’t be afraid to find yourself a mentor who has BEEN there and can help you along your own journey. I LOVE to help women with this exact process (starting and building successfully 💓). So if you would like to work with me, let’s DO IT! Come find me on Instagram @therealashleyta or head over to my “work with me” section, and we can get started TOGETHER.
EMBRACE FAILURE AS PART OF THE PROCESS: As we have been talking about here on this post– Failure is an inevitable part of any journey, but it’s how we learn and grow. So allow yourself to embrace mistakes as a learning opportunity, and don’t let it discourage you. Use these setbacks and mistakes as stepping stones and JUST KEEP GOING, FRIEND!
I know this was a LOT to take in, but I hope you find this post helpful if maybe you have noticed yourself giving into your self-limiting beliefs and holding yourself back. Getting started on anything new can definitely feel scary (because it’s new), especially if you don’t feel like you know enough or have all the answers. But remember, anyone just starting out doesn’t have all the answers. So give yourself the time and permission to start SLOW, and don’t beat yourself up if you don’t get it right immediately.
The power within you to achieve your goals (no matter what they are) is there, you just have to BELIEVE IT yourself! 🤗
I am forever rooting for you, friend!
Until my next post, take care of yourself from the inside out!
💓LOVE YOU!
